Are You Second Guessing Yourself?

Have you been second guessing yourself lately? Why do we second guess ourselves when it comes to making decisions?

We do this because on some level we do not trust ourselves to make the right choice. And where does this come from? If you have ever made a decision to do something and it didn't turn out the way you wanted it to, you will immediately tear yourself down and start the second-guessing process. You start to say things like, I knew better than to do that! Dang it, I wish I would have done XYZ instead.

You automatically assume you made the wrong choice because you don’t trust yourself to be right.

This kind of negative self-talk puts you in a pit of despair and it becomes easier and easier to continue this cycle which gets you nowhere. Has this happened to you before?

In order for change to happen you have to get to the real issue. It's not about the inability to make a choice, it's about not trusting yourself. Start there. Trail back to why you feel this way and find a memory that caused this feeling to surface. It could go back as far as childhood, or it could be from yesterday's lunch with a friend.  

When we don't trust ourselves, we turn to others for answers or suggestions.

This will keep us relying on others and underestimating our ability to make choices for ourselves. You also may have had the experience of asking someone's opinion and not taking the advice given. But that is just what it is, an opinion. This can be healthy for you because it allows you to trust yourself by doing what feels right instead of succumbing to the desires of someone else. This can also be an empowering step for you by realizing that you can make choices and decisions without the help of others. When you begin to trust yourself, you will no longer value the opinions of others over your own.

If you need help processing why you can’t trust yourself or others, reach out. I can help you.

You Are in the Driver’s Seat

September 2023

You Are in The Driver's Seat

Have you heard the song; Life is a Highway by Rascal Flatts? The song says life is like a road that you travel. It's the same concept in life and it is true for each of us. What you may not realize is that you are in the driver's seat of your life. When you sit behind the wheel of a car, you are in charge of where it goes, what turns it will make and what speed you will use to get where you are going. It's your decision to choose a route that best suits you. You may want to enjoy the view by taking roads that are less traveled or your preference could be a shorter distance by engaging in bumper-to-bumper traffic. It doesn't matter, it's all a choice, your choice.

 How you navigate your life is up to you.

You are always the one in charge, and you choose which roads you'll travel by the decisions you make. When faced with situations that are not difficult it's like choosing a scenic highway with beautiful scenery, soft rolling hills, and light traffic; your trip is pleasant, and you enjoy the ride.

Some roads are paved with excitement. That might be the one that points you towards accomplishing a goal that you set for yourself, falling in love with your best friend, or watching your children and grandchildren grow up. Other surfaces can be rough and turbulent and unpleasant to travel. These would be the roads that lead to sickness, or the loss of a loved one or your favorite pet. It could also be the path that leaves you feeling less than kind to yourself and others following a divorce or a breakup.

Regardless of where you choose to go in life, you are in charge.

It is easy to get turned around when driving the highways that are cluttered with buildings and bargains clamoring for your attention. These are the times when we have a deadline or destination to meet, and we could not help but to give in to the distractions that we encounter along the way. That would be the job you really wanted and instead settled for the one that came along. It's also the same as thinking that the perfect partner for you will never show up down the road, so you take what is in front of you; not willing to risk what you cannot see or imagine being greater. This road will become narrow and hard to navigate, leading our heart to become troubled.

You are the one behind the wheel with every twist and turn your life makes, and it's you that drives yourself up the mountain of success or down into the valley when you are feeling low.

Our attitude is like the weather when traveling roads and highways. Some days everything is perfectly clear, other days there are clouds that hang overhead. You can choose to focus on the beauty of what you see as you are driving by, enjoying the little things that make you smile, or you can hit the potholes of life that swallow you up.

How you choose to see your situation will determine the quality of your drive. If you allow frustrations to get the best of you, your experience will be much of the same for the rest of the day. By taking time to be in the present moment, you allow for better experiences, richer opportunities, and a quiet sense of peace that your heart longs to feel. That means go with the flow. Allow whatever happens to happen. It also means to let go and detach from outcomes that are out of your control.

Wherever you choose to go, embrace the wheel with a grip knowing that you are going in the right direction. You have the freedom to decide which road you will travel.  Life is a highway, and you don't have to travel alone.

If you need help in finding the road you wish to travel, allow me to direct you by scheduling an energy reading or energy healing.

Much love and appreciation,

How Are You? No, Really?

 How are you? No really. How are you?

It’s been a while since you have heard from me, so I wanted to let you know that I am still around doing what I love; styling hair and energy reading & healing work.

Since losing my husband in October of 2022, I have been trying to find my new normal. That means that I have had to figure a few things out on my own and the things that do not make sense to me, I am soliciting help from others for that. I get it that you may be stuck where you are on your personal discovery of life. I understand that you are not sure what kind of help you need, because that’s where I have been for the past 10 months.  I am right there with you!

If you are stuck in a routine or pattern that is making you feel dragged down with low energy and you are not sure what to do or how to move yourself out of it, you may want an energy reading. This gets to the root cause of what is going on with you on a deeper level.

 For every physical condition there is an underlying emotional, mental, or spiritual cause.

Not all blocked energy manifests itself into a physical condition. Sometimes it’s our beliefs that need changing. Other times it may be the way we speak to ourselves and others that can make the difference. When energy is stuck it needs to be moved out of our system so that we can begin enjoying the life we are creating.

What does stuck energy look like?

·         Why do I feel mad at myself or my partner? (Mental cause)

·         I have pain in my body, and I want it gone. (Physical cause)

·         I feel controlled by kids, spouse, work, parents, or friends. (Emotional cause)

·         I can’t seem to understand why people do what they do. (Spiritual cause)

The list could go on and on and I’m sure you could add a thing or two and make the list even longer.

The quicker we make sense of what’s going on in our life the faster we can fix it and move on.

There is an answer to all your questions and concerns. If you want to know the cause of what is blocking you, you may want to consider having an energy reading where together we can break down the barriers and discovery what is really going on inside of you so you can begin to heal the wounds of the past and begin living right now. Check out what I do and then decide if I am a good fit for you.

Let your healing journey begin. I look forward to hearing from you.

With love and appreciation,

Your Words Have Power

Everyone loves the famous one-line phrase from Dirty Dancing where Patrick Swayze says, “Nobody puts Baby in a corner.” It symbolizes being pushed aside and unimportant. That is exactly how I felt when the catchphrase, “You are to be seen and not heard” was tossed at me as a young child. I had better shut up and fade into the background quietly, without a word coming from my mouth before the evil eye of an adult swooped down and landed on me. My heart was shut down and scared away before I could get started with my own exciting story.

It would be easy to blame the one who spread this phrase like butter on fresh bread, and I did for many years until the day arrived and my own realization slammed me in the face. I chose to believe that nothing I had to say would matter. Whether I was a nine-year-old with a budding desire to speak or a lot older offering words of wisdom, the feeling was all the same. Deep down I hung onto an old belief that implied my unspoken words would not make a hill-of-beans difference to anyone. I then had to make another choice. I chose to think differently. I didn’t want to, but in order for my life to change for the better, I had to. I found the courage to come out of the shell that protected me from being who I was, so that I could become a brighter light for myself and one that could help others.

My story changed and yours can too.

Slowly but surely, my eyes started to open to the lie that my soul picked up as truth. I realized that I had a lot to say and there were many people that wanted to listen. I had to find the ones that were in the same boat and rowing the choppy waters as me. Navigating against the incoming tide is not easy, but once you get going it becomes easier to not break your stride. Eventually you will find yourself floating in the calm still waters of peace when you replace the false claims and untruths that have a hold on you. It is important to replace these beliefs of who you think you are with the ones of who you can become.

It is in these moments that you find your voice; the one that has a lot to say.

That’s when your story begins to change.

To become the hearer of great wisdom, you will have to do more listening. This is a vital part to shedding the darkness of unkind thoughts about yourself and the beliefs that no longer bring comfort to your soul. You must listen to the voice of your higher power in order to hear the real truth of who you are.

There comes a time to listen, but make no mistake, there is never a time to not be heard. Those days are over. If only my young mind could have comprehended this earlier in life, but it did not. Becoming self-aware of your thought patterns will help you break the ever-circling cycle of negative reminders of who you aren’t.

Let’s pick up the pieces of confusion and lay them out on the table so we can eliminate them once and for all. When rearranged in our life they should look something like this….

·         Never underestimate your self-worth by the thoughts you choose.

·         You have something to say. Speak your truth, not someone else’s.

·         What you have to say is important; maybe not to everyone, but to someone.

·         Find your voice. If it has been buried alive, dig it up, dust it off, and start using it.

Knowledge is power and words matter. It is not very wise to bulldoze each other with slogans of expression that can plow through someone’s heart. When speaking to yourself or to others, choose your words carefully. Like picking flowers from a garden, choose the ones that are beautiful, bright, and beaming with uplifting potential, for those are the ones that make a difference in your life and to the ones that need to hear them. Words that do not come from the heart tend to cause more harm than good.

Let me show you what I am talking about.

When we speak slowly and with intention our comments can be encouraging. They can stir another heart to respond with love instead of anger, hurt, and resentment. This in turn can draw you closer to the recipient of your kindness. Think about a time when you spoke a sweet gesture to a stranger. When they smiled back at you in agreement, did your heart flutter just a little as a signal of approval from above?

That is what happened when I raced to the checkout counter only to be beat by a teenage mom in a hurry. If I did not know better, I would have pegged her for a race car driver the way she wheeled her cart in front of me! I chose to offer her kindness instead of the insult that was ready to roll off my tongue. I helped her load her baby food, diapers, and other dry goods onto the conveyer belt. We became instant friends as I listen to her talk ninety-miles-per-hour about her pride and joy, the ten-month old toddler that called her mama. She was rushing to get to work on time but her baby required a few necessities. Who would I be to hold up someone trying to do the right thing? I did not want to be another discouraging voice, so I chose to smile as I offered my help and a silent prayer that her world would not be turned upside down that day because I wanted to go first. I gave her what I wanted when I was her age; a chance to be seen and to be heard. It was in the spirit of giving that I received the tug of compassion for the soon to be adult. For a quick moment, our hearts beat as one leaving us both filled with peace.

It all starts with a thought and then a voice, followed by action. When we simply choose to think different thoughts and change our perspective about our situation, we can then move on and become a positive voice to ourselves and others. Our beliefs can often trip us up into being pushed into a corner where we think no one cares or wants to listen to what we have to say, but that does not have to be your reality. You were born to be seen and to be heard, and that is the truth.

If you are struggling to see past the hurt that is crippling your thoughts, then let me help you organize your mind in a way that will help you to see yourself from a different perspective.

Much love and appreciation for you.